Two Bush Jokes and One Bush Non-Joke

A Bush joke:

How many members of the Bush Administration are needed to replace a
lightbulb?

The Answer is SEVEN:

1. one to deny that a lightbulb needs to be replaced

2. one to attack and question the patriotism of anyone who has questions about the lightbulb,

3. one to blame the previous administration for the need of a new lightbulb,

4. one to arrange the invasion of a country rumored to have a secret stockpile of lightbulbs,

5. one to get together with Vice President Cheney and figure out how to pay Halliburton Industries one million dollars for a lightbulb,

6. one to arrange a photo-op session showing Bush changing the lightbulb while dressed in a flight suit and wrapped in an American flag,

7. and finally one to explain to Bush the difference between screwing a lightbulb and screwing the country.

Another Bush joke:

The Center for Disease Control has issued a warning about a new virulent
strain of Sexually Transmitted Disease. The disease is contracted through
dangerous and high-risk behavior. The disease is called
Gonorrhea Lectim and pronounced "gonna re-elect him."

Many victims contracted it in 2004, after having been screwed for the past
four years. Cognitive characteristics of individuals infected include:
anti-social personality disorders, delusions of grandeur with messianic
overtones, extreme cognitive dissonance, inability to incorporate new
information, pronounced xenophobia and paranoia, inability to accept
responsibility for own actions, cowardice masked by misplaced bravado,
uncontrolled facial smirking, ignorance of geography and history,
tendencies
towards evangelical theocracy, categorical all-or-nothing behavior.
Naturalists and epidemiologists are amazed at how this destructive disease
originated only a few years ago from a bush found in Texas.

Not a joke:

"Today, for two separate reasons, has been an incredible day in America. First, the United States has legitimized torture and secondly, the President has admitted to an impeachable offense."

//The Magic 8-Ball says, "The laugh is on all of you."\\